YES, WE’RE HARPING. IT’S WHAT WE DO HERE.

No unelected gov-mint bureaucrat ever asked the tax payers if they wanted to pay the ‘lectric bill of those who choose not to work; they just did it. Now my local power company me to send some extra jack in with my bill to add to what my tax dollars are already doing. (Unlike the gov-mint, at least they asked.) The ‘lectric letter was accompanied by a brochure. Did it feature a real-world, overweight, ear/eyebrow/nose/cheek/lip/navel-pierced smoker with six fat kids demonstrating diversity of origin? Nope. The photo showed a yogurt/pilates model reading to (Uh, huh) a spit-shined sprout. Nice try, but they still gave it away. I’m s’posed to help ‘em keep warm in winter; the kid is clad in, you guessed it, a fucking T-shirt.

The President of Duke Energy never answered my letter, but she sure as shit read it. This year’s flyer features a venerable Helsinki Hasidic*, bundled and babushka’d, huddling in her hovel. Do-dah……

*Was gonna say, “Russian Jew” (we’ve all seen the ads on the Christian Channel), but it lacked imagination and alliteration.

P.C. Police: How…judgmental. Every 300 pound EBC hustler needs navel nuggets when she wears her half-shirt to the hair & nail salon.
What were you thinking?

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