Work for a living: get drug tested.
Sit on your ass, collect food stamps/disability/energy assistance: huff away.
Note: Sport a neck tattoo and you may not get that job. Festoon yourself with total body ink and a pound o’ piercings, why, you may waltz right into the welfare office and have an unelected career bureaucrat fawn over you while he/she/it signs you up for “entitlements” you never even heard of (Your 8 children share 3 phones just because they have different last names? Tsk, task. We’ll fix that.) on the backs of the taxpayers.
Q: Why she don’t care you spent thousands on body bling, ink, and you just put $5,000 worth of rims on your $500 ride?
A: Bro. Ain’t her jack she be handin’ out.
Next: Show your fake ID at the bar, not the voting booth. (That would be racist.)