FUNDAMENTALISM FOR BEGINNERS

Each and ever word in the Bible is spot-on accurate except that “wine” means “grape juice.” Do-dah.

RE: THE ABOVE:

Never mind that the original Hebrew and Aramaic texts were translated into Greek, then Latin, then Elizabethan (Jamesian?) English*. If you think that nothing was lost during three translations, I invite you to look up any modern expression (say: “No belts, pins, or pads”) in Phoenician.

*Are you kidding me? God doesn’t really say “thee,” “thou,” etc.?

Q: Yikes! D’ya think that Jesus drank w-w-wine?

A: In moderation.

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